Parents who are Catholic converts

[amasimp]

This question is directed to those parents out there that have converted to Catholicism and are now raising Catholic children.  Do you find yourselves keeping your kids in a sort of "all Catholic, all the time" type environment perhaps over-correcting for the lack of Catholic formation you had as a child?

My husband and I are both converts from completely secular households.  We often talk about how we would do things "when the kids come".  No playing on secular sports teams, no "non-Catholic" books, movies, etc..  I won't know until I'm a parent (hopefully...), but I often wonder how much of that attitude is proper in the sense of protecting kids from unhealthy influences and how much of it is trying to live out a childhood I wish I had when I decided to convert.

[elizabee]

Hm what an interesting question! My background is similar (secular family, no children yet--engaged) but my approach is different. I think when my fiancé and I talk about parenting on this level, we agree that there is a lot of good and beauty in "secular" media that is sometimes missed out on by cradle-Catholic families... I think both he and I had relatively good experiences of the world & culture, albeit ultimately unsatisfying and absurd in and of itself - but once we found the right centre and context we've come to enjoy "secular" (ie not sinful but not explicitly Catholic either) things like movies etc even more. On books I am less resolved - books have a more subtle influence, I think... I imagine we will filter both, of course, like any parents, but be sure to have plenty of both in good quantity and variety.
When did you convert?

[JonW]

I am in a similar but different situation.  I am a convert with one child on the way, married to a non-Catholic.  This should be interesting, and very very hard.  God bless you both.

[Katherine of Aragon]

My husband and I are both Catholic converts. We converted just over four years ago, when our children were six, four, and two.  Now our children are 10, 9, 7, 2, and 9 mos. 

We were both raised in Protestant households, but my upbringing was certainly devout in the way of my parents' denomination.  We do allow our children to read secular books and watch secular movies, but we make certain that they know what is good and what is not in what they read and watch.  We have our own Catholic practices in our home, and everything revolves around Christ and His Church.  With that in place, we do not worry about making everything "Catholic."

[cgraye]

We were both raised in Protestant households, but my upbringing was certainly devout in the way of my parents' denomination.  We do allow our children to read secular books and watch secular movies, but we make certain that they know what is good and what is not in what they read and watch.  We have our own Catholic practices in our home, and everything revolves around Christ and His Church.  With that in place, we do not worry about making everything "Catholic."

This seems like the most sensible approach to me.  I think absolutely forbidding anything non-Catholic is just going to make the children more curious about it as they get older, and when they have their freedom, they will explore it without any restraint at all.  I know people who have done this, and it is very sad.  Plus, as pointed out, there are a great deal of wonderful things out there that are not explicitly Catholic - music, art, literature, film, and it would be a shame to deprive them of those things just because they do not have explicitly Christian themes.  Just make sure to filter out things that have anti-Catholic themes, and that's a good place to start.

[SearchingCatholic]

We were both raised in Protestant households, but my upbringing was certainly devout in the way of my parents' denomination.  We do allow our children to read secular books and watch secular movies, but we make certain that they know what is good and what is not in what they read and watch.  We have our own Catholic practices in our home, and everything revolves around Christ and His Church.  With that in place, we do not worry about making everything "Catholic."

This seems like the most sensible approach to me.  I think absolutely forbidding anything non-Catholic is just going to make the children more curious about it as they get older, and when they have their freedom, they will explore it without any restraint at all.  I know people who have done this, and it is very sad.  Plus, as pointed out, there are a great deal of wonderful things out there that are not explicitly Catholic - music, art, literature, film, and it would be a shame to deprive them of those things just because they do not have explicitly Christian themes.  Just make sure to filter out things that have anti-Catholic themes, and that's a good place to start.

This approach is similar to mine.  I am a Catholic convert and initially wanted to homeschool to protect my children.  Looking back, without my husband's influence, I would have over-sheltered them and set them up for rebellion later.  We pick and choose from the popular culture and then watch or read and discuss as a family.  This way our kids learn how we apply our values!

[mamalove]

i was raised baptized and made my first communion but that was about it.  husband was not baptized, no religion at all growing up.  we have lived the crazy lives of hippies and the new age movement.  i converted about 5 years ago and husband was baptized this fall.

at first i was really strict about everything, almost like an amish home.  no movies, books, anything that had any secular influence.  luckily i have come back to the middle ground with all that.  i ask my husbands opinion if i am not sure.  we are still really strict about movies and tv because there is so much trash out there.  i help the children find books at the library from big lists i have of good books (since b ooks can be trash as well)  but we do secular, christian and Catholic.  I am more likely to purchase something catholic for the home.   

as far as toys, i chucked the barbies and gave the girls dollhouses, paper dolls and baby dolls.  nobody needs to be brought up to be a fashion-ista.  i ruled out scooby doo and sponge bob....but gave in to star wars and peanuts ect.

I do homeschool, and we hang out with our church friends.  we live in the country, so we dont have neighbors knocking on our door wanting to play.  I would like to get the children involved in more group things outside church as they get older. 

my main thing is to watch out for anything that could bring them into the grips of the new age.  that stuff is demonic and scary, i have first hand experience.  I am pretty open with the chidlren about why we live the way we do and why daddy and I make the choices we do for the family.  I have faith that God will protect our children if I do the best that I can to do my part.  I want to raise them for His service. 

BUT you can do all the sheltering of the children you want, and if there is not super strong love, discipline, happiness and a rock solid family prayer life.....your fruit will indeed be wanting.