NFP ?

[GaPeach]

I know this is a hot topic at times but I am wondering (and have always) is age alone a factor to use it? As I understand the teaching, it says we are only to use it for the duration of the time the serious reason exists.  In the case of age, that could be quite a long time.  I am about to turn 40 and suddenly I am scared to ever be pregnant again.  Twice in the last month, I have been asked if my baby was my granddaughter.  I feel like a grandma but I'm not.  This ole body just seems worn out.  I am a tired, grumpy mama most of the time because parenting/homeschooling 7 children takes all of my energy. 

[Sophia]

Boy can I sympathize with you about the homeschooling. It can be insane with an infant or toddlers. 

Yes, NFP is usually a very hot topic, and one we've discussed before to great length.  I'm sorry to have to tell you that age is not a reason to use NFP.  Age is not a "grave reason" to not have children, even though we may feel like it should be. 

Don't worry about the rude and ignorant comments of others regarding pregnancy or young children at your age.  Don't let it get you down and start to think that it really isn't possible to have another one at your age.   This is only a temptation.  You can do all things in Christ, and God gives us the grace to handle everything thrown our way. 

[Marylou]

First Post ! Here I go!
No, No, No, it is not that nasty NFP that you want.  Sounds to me that  you may need a good iron supplement instead.  I am really serious.  I had our tenth child while homeschooling at 42 and two miscarriages since.  I never felt old.  I do feel older now though at 48 because my second grandchild is on the way and I now know that that precious time of childbearing is gone from me (however, miracles do happen as I have an aunt who conceived and brought to term a wonderful son at 50, so who but God knows??)
Believe me, I know how tough it is homeschooling a large brood with babies and toddlers but where I come from no matter how manic the day was I knew that my kids were better off at home with me, that was enough to keep me going....  one way or another with the grace of God we would make it.  
Grace, it is all about grace.  We have floods of it available to us through the sacrament of matrimony and we just don't draw heavily enough on it.
 Leave it all to the Divine Providence of God... and Grace.

A mother of many children, who was about to be a mother once more came to
Ars to seek courage at the feet of St. John Vianney. She said to him: "Oh, I
am so advanced in years, Father!" St. John Vianney responded: "Be conforted
my child, if you only knew the women who will go to Hell because they did
not bring into the world they children they should have given it!"

 If you conceive it is His will alone and He will not abandon you.

Do give yourself a lift though and get a good high dose Iron supplement if you are not taking one.  Works wonders for me - keeps the energy pumping... and smile - a lot.  You have much to smile about because you are doing the will of God and He will reward you abundantly for that.

God Bless

[GaPeach]

I actually started a new supplement with iron and feel better after only 2 weeks!  So does anyone have any tips on how to not feel crazy when the kids cry.  It seems like someone is always crying (either my 4, 2 or 1 year old--not the older ones).  I feel so irritated and want to be alone after the cry so much.  I am very much a loner who hates noise.  Also, how does one keep going (emotionally) if you experience lots of miscarriages.  That is another fear I have.  I have already had 4 miscarriages throughout my married life (in addition to my 7 living) and I know the risk increases with age.  It is just so hard emotionally.  I know these are what if's but they are concerns for me.  Thanks again everyone. 

[AdoramusTeChriste]

I actually started a new supplement with iron and feel better after only 2 weeks!  So does anyone have any tips on how to not feel crazy when the kids cry.  It seems like someone is always crying (either my 4, 2 or 1 year old--not the older ones).  I feel so irritated and want to be alone after the cry so much.  I am very much a loner who hates noise.  Also, how does one keep going (emotionally) if you experience lots of miscarriages.  That is another fear I have.  I have already had 4 miscarriages throughout my married life (in addition to my 7 living) and I know the risk increases with age.  It is just so hard emotionally.  I know these are what if's but they are concerns for me.  Thanks again everyone. 

I am 47 and my baby is 5. I have had 2 miscarriages; one before him and one after. It is a mysterious cross to be sure. The pain, emotions, and rapid hormonal change are all factors that make the event devastating. Like all difficult crosses, we just need to draw closer to Christ, and that is best done through His Mother.

 

I have found that 2% progesterone cream to be very effective in balancing out the hormonal changes that begin around 35 or 40. I am irritated much less often and as a bonus my periods are less heavy, my hair stopped falling out, and my nails look great again. I read about progesterone cream in this book. I have checked with 2 physicians and they assure me that the cream is safe and effective and that the benefits I have noticed are real.

[maryskey]

I personally think your Faith is being tested. NFP can seem like a real temptation at various times. I just turned 37 a couple months ago, and right before my bday I was treated to the loss of what would have been our 12th child. I haven't lost a baby since 1992 or so and had 10 very normal and healthy pregnancies since. So this was a curveball thrown at me. My first loss was devastating (and I wasn't Catholic at the time), but it taught me how to handle future losses should I have any.  I have to say being Catholic during this second loss was very comforting. I was able to conditionally baptize anything that resembled remains and can at least have some semblance of hope for that child's soul.  Anyway, I think we all get scared when we get older. I am now 11 wks or so along with my 12th baby (14th pregnancy). I have pretty much resigned myself to having babies thruout at least my mid-40's, but now this latest loss has added a new aspect. I may not actually HAVE babies thruout my mid-40's... they could end up being miscarriages. I also worry about down's syndrome, etc. but again, it's a Faith thing. I have to believe that God knows what He is doing when he allows my husband and I to conceive these children.. perfectly healthy or not.  And I think as long as I keep that in mind, all will be fine.. even if I am still having babies as I begin to have grandchildren.  LOL

 

[miss_fluffy]

I find all of you fine Catholic ladies to be such an inspiration.  I truely admire your dedication to motherhood.  Your unfathomable love and respect for life brings tears to my eyes.

[Guadalupe]

Gapeach said:

I have already had 4 miscarriages throughout my married life (in addition to my 7 living) and I know the risk increases with age.  It is just so hard emotionally.  I know these are what if's but they are concerns for me.   

 

I have had 14 miscarriages and 2 live births, (both c-sec) it can be really hard to work through, but as one of the other ladies mentioned, faith in the Lord knowing best can be really comforting. I guess for me it helped to focus on my living children and be thankful that I was able to have any at all. What is the most rough for me is when I am talking to another Catholic lady and I tell them that I have only 2 children, eight years apart, and the look I get tells me that it is assumed that I use some form of birth control, or I would be blessed with more children. On the upside, we are considering adoption, so maybe we will be blessed that way, huh?

[gemma_philothea]

First Post ! Here I go!
No, No, No, it is not that nasty NFP that you want. Sounds to me that you may need a good iron supplement instead. I am really serious. I had our tenth child while homeschooling at 42 and two miscarriages since. I never felt old. I do feel older now though at 48 because my second grandchild is on the way and I now know that that precious time of childbearing is gone from me (however, miracles do happen as I have an aunt who conceived and brought to term a wonderful son at 50, so who but God knows??)
Believe me, I know how tough it is homeschooling a large brood with babies and toddlers but where I come from no matter how manic the day was I knew that my kids were better off at home with me, that was enough to keep me going.... one way or another with the grace of God we would make it.
Grace, it is all about grace. We have floods of it available to us through the sacrament of matrimony and we just don't draw heavily enough on it.
Leave it all to the Divine Providence of God... and Grace.

A mother of many children, who was about to be a mother once more came to
Ars to seek courage at the feet of St. John Vianney. She said to him: "Oh, I
am so advanced in years, Father!" St. John Vianney responded: "Be conforted
my child, if you only knew the women who will go to Hell because they did
not bring into the world they children they should have given it!"

If you conceive it is His will alone and He will not abandon you.

Do give yourself a lift though and get a good high dose Iron supplement if you are not taking one. Works wonders for me - keeps the energy pumping... and smile - a lot. You have much to smile about because you are doing the will of God and He will reward you abundantly for that.

God Bless

 

Don't forget vitamin B complex supplement! The American diet is poor in B vitamins. I take this too and it really helps with my energy level. The best part is that it is safe, whatever you body does not need, it gets rid of.

 

JMJ,

Gemma

[Marty]

First Post ! Here I go!

 

Gday Mum!!