Exhausted Mother's Fantasies

[mom]

I love to cook and I have kids to do the dishes :D
Laundry isn't any big deal and neither is driving around most of the time and I do a LOT of driving around (about 300 miles/week).
I want a housekeeper. I'd love to have someone do all the menial day-day housecleaning Iwashing floors, vacuuming, cleaning baseboards, swapping clothes when seasons change, dusting, windows, cleaning under couches, vacuuming stairs, sweeping, wiping counters, changing litter boxes, organizing closets....someone that did a good thorough job, didn't have to be told to and did it without rolling their eyes or sighing. IOW, a someone that is NOT a child.
I want an 'Alice'. She'll live in a little room off the kitchen and keep my house spotless and do it all with a smile.

[flannerywannabe]

I need a maid, please. Preferably live-in, full-time, so that I can drop back to having only ONE full-time job. 

[Underdog]

I want a full-time cook. 

My m-i-l was visiting this past week.  She is amazing in the kitchen--she knows what's for dinner a month in advance.  While here she basically took over my kitchen (even cleaned out the fridge).  It was great.  I got to spend a lot more time tending to the baby and the laundry, and b/c she is an early riser I had a coffee waiting for me every morning. 

[elizabee]

I love to cook and I have kids to do the dishes :D
Laundry isn't any big deal and neither is driving around most of the time and I do a LOT of driving around (about 300 miles/week).
I want a housekeeper. I'd love to have someone do all the menial day-day housecleaning Iwashing floors, vacuuming, cleaning baseboards, swapping clothes when seasons change, dusting, windows, cleaning under couches, vacuuming stairs, sweeping, wiping counters, changing litter boxes, organizing closets....someone that did a good thorough job, didn't have to be told to and did it without rolling their eyes or sighing. IOW, a someone that is NOT a child.
I want an 'Alice'. She'll live in a little room off the kitchen and keep my house spotless and do it all with a smile.

My maid would come out at night and silently reset my whole house to perfect. I remember some girlscout story of girls helping some family out like this. I might be confusing it with the elves who made shoes. Or another alternative would be to win the lottery (sadly always my financial plan B) then my hubby could take off 3 years of work,  by then the babies will be 5, 4,and3. Running the house would be a lot easier. Of course I would be healthier, skinnier, and very peppy, with thicker hair. If I think of anything else I will let you know. 

LOl! No, you are not being confused by elf stories -- the Brownie myth is about little girls who wish they could find magic brownies (fairies) to clean up and do their chores so they could play all day -- the wise forest owl shows them cleverly that THEY are meant to be the brownies -- so the girls have a turn-around, go home and clean everything and act very helpful and modest, and thus the Brownie organization was founded, or so the story goes. It is told at every Brownie's initiation ceremony, complete with toadstool hopping.