Why do people look down on large families

[Satori]

You know, I am not married and thus don't have any children right now, but I kind of look down on families who don't have more than two children.  Many of the families I know are quite capable of supporting more children financially, but they have just drunk the kool-aid that children are a burden and need to be limited and so on. 

You shouldn't look down on them. You don't know why they only have two.

[AntoniusMaximus]

You know, I am not married and thus don't have any children right now, but I kind of look down on families who don't have more than two children.  Many of the families I know are quite capable of supporting more children financially, but they have just drunk the kool-aid that children are a burden and need to be limited and so on. 

You shouldn't look down on them. You don't know why they only have two.

It's not that I go out and start waving the finger.  Though this actually reminds me of a brief and fairly comical story.  I had a professor who once was in Israel/Palestine and he was among a Bedouin tribe and he attended a wedding while there.  Of course, he tells us the details of Arab weddings like all the sounds and stuff.  Anyhow, he was there with his wife, they are both in their late 30's at the time and didn't have children at the time.  The Bedouin sheik came up to him and asked him where his children were.  He told the sheik that he didn't have any, and the sheik starts consoling him as if he was impotent.  I thought that was funny.  He had another funny story too about how he was in an Arby's with his two kids, both under 10, and he was close to 50, and the server talks to the kids and she was like "oh how are you doing with granpa," thinking that they are his grandkids, I thought that was funny too.

[jovan66102]

He had another funny story too about how he was in an Arby's with his two kids, both under 10, and he was close to 50, and the server talks to the kids and she was like "oh how are you doing with granpa," thinking that they are his grandkids, I thought that was funny too.

When we were expecting our third, the wife brought the two boys (2 & 4) to see me at work. When they left, a young girl working with me asked if they were my grandsons. I laughed and said, 'No they're my sons and we're expecting another little one'.

[James02]

If it is a stranger, I say "Don't worry, we can afford it".  It's always fun to see the look on their face when they try to figure out how to respond.   If it's someone I know, then the reply is f&^% off.

[introibo]

It's the status quo to have 2. Any more is a drain on the environment.  And you're having unprotected relations with your husband.  Bad, even in marriage.  Can't you control yourself?  How will you pay for college?  You are irresponsible, bringing all those mouths to feed in this world where there is so much want and hunger and so many children needing homes.  And you better not be on welfare, with all those kids.  Blah Blah Blah. 

And down deep, many of these people really "want another one," but do not want to buck the status quo, and are venting their jealousy on you.

Christina/mother of 9

[mattman1970]

My wife and I just had our fourth child this past Thursday, and so many people think that we are crazy for having four kids.  I just don't understand it.  I personally see children a blessing from God, and not as a curse, as many seem to see them.

-Matt

[SanctiDominici]

You know, I am not married and thus don't have any children right now, but I kind of look down on families who don't have more than two children.  Many of the families I know are quite capable of supporting more children financially, but they have just drunk the kool-aid that children are a burden and need to be limited and so on. 

I read an article that said most people pick two kids for the most retarded reasons...only two window seats in a the back seat of the car so no fighting, only two kids can sit in a roller coaster together, most everything is meant for 2 kids so the third would be a third wheel.

Is this not the most ridiculous reasons for stopping at 2 kids. God help us!

[SanctiDominici]

If it is a stranger, I say "Don't worry, we can afford it".  It's always fun to see the look on their face when they try to figure out how to respond.   If it's someone I know, then the reply is f&^% off.

I sort of do the same thing. When they say " how many are you going to have?", I say "why are you paying for them?" Then of course I get assaulted over my age. I have 4 kids and Im only 30. Then I get " how old are you" and I look them dead in th eye and say "old enough!"

[SanctiDominici]

It's the status quo to have 2. Any more is a drain on the environment.  And you're having unprotected relations with your husband.  Bad, even in marriage.  Can't you control yourself?  How will you pay for college?  You are irresponsible, bringing all those mouths to feed in this world where there is so much want and hunger and so many children needing homes.  And you better not be on welfare, with all those kids.  Blah Blah Blah. 

And down deep, many of these people really "want another one," but do not want to buck the status quo, and are venting their jealousy on you.

Christina/mother of 9

You hit the nail on the head! I feel most people who make these comments have no children of their own or wanted children but couldnt have them so they have to vent on a perfect stranger! Im the wrong one to vent too!

[CanadianCatholic]

To be honest, YES I am getting really DAMN tired of the looks and comments. Every non catholic friend of mine shakes their head and says things like "seriously, you need to stop, at first it was kind of funny, but this is getting ridiculous, you guys are going to be starving and homeless", or "you guys are nutz, your never going to be able to afford vacations and college, blah blah blah etc..." We do get looks when we go out in public with our 3 kids, 4 when my step daughter is here, and now its even worse cause im starting to show. I struggle not to be embarrassed when strangers say things, i love my kids, and I am so proud of my beautiful healthy children, but i am out "in the world" alot, and i hear a comment about it probably 2 - 3 times a week. It doesnt help when ppl find out im 24 either....I grew up listening to this crap, being #7 of 13, ppl used to say nasty things about my parents, and undignified dirty things about my mother...it was hard sometimes.

Sorry for the rant....this subject is really close to home for me, and its getting worse all the time, ppl can be such jerks sometimes....