libby
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"does this bike make me look fat?" - VoxClamantis
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« Reply #50 on: January 02, 2010, 03:12:PM » |
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Brevis, every mother with an 18 year old daughter is going to be stampeding towards your PM box, 
I think the main reason with the parents is that they never really grew up.
If they're still leaning on the trunk of a Cutlass trying to get their stories straight with their drunk buddies before going inside to face the parents, then how are they going to be able to parent anyone?
so, it's back to high school and finger pointing. They don't have the testicular or ovarian tissue to tell their kid NO , and the only way that they can save face is having all the other parents act in the same wimpy way.
I remember my friend gushing... absolutely gushing about another mother's performance at a school meeting.The woman stood and said that she thought it was irresponsible to allow her daughter to visit a friend's house that didn't have a drawer full of condoms in the kitchen - that it would be teaching her child to act without preparation - and isn't preparation what it's all about?
My buddy thought it was so brave and noble - because that's what she was going to do too, as soon as her oldest turned 14.
Yes, it was a Catholic school - and yes, these were all Catholics. When i asked her if maybe teaching her kids that that was a delight best saved for marriage and keeping a leash - not too tight, either - on them would be a better choice, she said that high school was tough enough without having her poor children having to suffer like outcasts because they don't have the same opportunities as everybody else.
She found someone willing to go along with her so they would all fit in at the pep rally, along with everyone else.
I'd rather be smoking behind the gym.


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JayneK
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« Reply #51 on: January 02, 2010, 04:33:PM » |
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Brevis, every mother with an 18 year old daughter is going to be stampeding towards your PM box, 
Hey, I'm wondering if he will wait 6 years for my 12 year old. ;D
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ADORABLE Saviour, consider my many wants, and grant me those graces which Thou knowest I stand in need of to do Thy will in all things.
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Walty
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« Reply #52 on: January 02, 2010, 05:02:PM » |
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My parents let me date as soon as I got into high school. They were good about making sure we were supervised, but I still probably won't let my kids. Nothing good ever comes out of dating that young. There are a few sets of adults I know who married after high school, but they are far and few between and these are different times. People don't even get married soon after college much less while still in college.
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The Church is intolerant in principle because she believes; she is tolerant in practice because she loves. The enemies of the Church are tolerant in principle because they do not believe; they are intolerant in practice because they do not love. Timorem Domini docebo vos.
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Jacafamala
My mother, my confidence.
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Discorso della luna.
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« Reply #53 on: January 02, 2010, 05:37:PM » |
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For the boys, I say keep them very, very busy. Between school, pt job, scouts, wrestling, and venture crew my son has no time to date.  For the girls, keep them sheltered. They can do things too, but they need to be watched even more so than boys; they're more vulnerable. They're not always mature enough to make good decisions, even if they are good and smart kids. Put the fear of God into them, and frequent Confession.
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« Last Edit: January 02, 2010, 05:39:PM by Jacafamala »
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rosamysticamantilla.com Above all things, preserve constant charity among yourselves; charity draws the veil over a multitude of sins. -1 Peter
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Iolanthe
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"If one can't be happy one must be amused"
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« Reply #54 on: January 02, 2010, 08:09:PM » |
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For the girls, keep them sheltered. They can do things too, but they need to be watched even more so than boys; they're more vulnerable.
The best way to prepare a girl to be helpless in the real world and even more vulnerable is to shelter her. No offense, but that's terrible advice.
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"Tenthly, one should pour tea into the cup first. This is one of the most controversial points of all; indeed in every family in Britain there are probably two schools of thought on the subject. The milk-first school can bring forward some fairly strong arguments, but I maintain that my own argument is unanswerable. This is that, by putting the tea in first and stirring as one pours, one can exactly regulate the amount of milk, whereas one is liable to put in too much milk if one does it the other way round." George Orwell
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CanadianCatholic
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Kickin @$$ and takin names
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« Reply #55 on: January 02, 2010, 08:11:PM » |
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For the girls, keep them sheltered. They can do things too, but they need to be watched even more so than boys; they're more vulnerable.
The best way to prepare a girl to be helpless in the real world and even more vulnerable is to shelter her. No offense, but that's terrible advice. No offense to anyone, but I agree with you %100 lolanthe....If anything, you have to teach girls to be tougher, as the world can be harder on women.
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Walty
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« Reply #56 on: January 02, 2010, 08:17:PM » |
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The world sweeps up young girls and turns them (and their own self perception of themselves) into nothing but meat. Girls don't need to be sheltered from social things or the burdens of life (those things will present themselves no matter what you do). They do need to be sheltered from worldiness. I've seen girls that were raised very well but lose it because their parents gave them just a little too much leeway innocently enough. Pretty soon it gets ugly. The same goes from boys, but girls are more susceptible to boys and their immediate influence than vice-versa.
Girls should stick very closely to their parents until they find a husband. Likewise with a man. It's too crappy out there.
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The Church is intolerant in principle because she believes; she is tolerant in practice because she loves. The enemies of the Church are tolerant in principle because they do not believe; they are intolerant in practice because they do not love. Timorem Domini docebo vos.
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ResiduumRevertetur
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« Reply #57 on: January 02, 2010, 08:18:PM » |
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For the girls, keep them sheltered. They can do things too, but they need to be watched even more so than boys; they're more vulnerable.
The best way to prepare a girl to be helpless in the real world and even more vulnerable is to shelter her. No offense, but that's terrible advice. I know it doesn't happen to everyone, but my mom opened the door as soon as I wanted to get out of the house and turned me loose with no supervision. She didn't want me to be "repressed". After a couple years of that, I wanted a short leash, believe me. What I wouldn't have given for a family that was concerned about what I was doing and with whom. My husband was just the same. We're truly lucky we made it out alive. Actually, his past may still kill him (though I pray he has a long, long time yet). But yeah. It's that bad.
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The name's Braintrust. Mr. Braintrust.
The Almighty says this must be a fashionable fight. It's drawn the finest people. --Stephen, Braveheart ~~~~~~~~~~~~ Deus, tu conversus vivificabis nos, et plebs tua laetabitur in te.
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libby
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Posts: 5,873
"does this bike make me look fat?" - VoxClamantis
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« Reply #58 on: January 02, 2010, 08:20:PM » |
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I think that everyone's right - Jaca's not saying that she's going to keep them locked in their shelter, just that she'll shelter them more as in keeping an eye out for them.
I think that's what she's saying...?
Anyway, you need to be careful with them all - because at the end of their stay with you, out they go - and you have to pray that whatever you taught them, stuck.
That's why you have to be so careful - you never know when they really did hear what you said - even if it was the same routine, day in and day out - it's what they learn.
Eventually, sooner or later, it comes back to them.
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Iolanthe
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"If one can't be happy one must be amused"
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« Reply #59 on: January 02, 2010, 08:31:PM » |
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The world sweeps up young girls and turns them (and their own self perception of themselves) into nothing but meat. Girls don't need to be sheltered from social things or the burdens of life (those things will present themselves no matter what you do). They do need to be sheltered from worldiness. I've seen girls that were raised very well but lose it because their parents gave them just a little too much leeway innocently enough. Pretty soon it gets ugly. The same goes from boys, but girls are more susceptible to boys and their immediate influence than vice-versa.
Girls should stick very closely to their parents until they find a husband. Likewise with a man. It's too crappy out there.
It's the world God put us in, and it's up to us to survive. Men and women. Did God make a mistake when he put us here, or does he expect us to make the best of it? And I don't believe girls are more easily influenced by worldliness. I've seen more guys go astray than girls....it's just that no one says anything when it's the guys. Most of the so-called "sheltering" that goes on in Traditional homes is just an excuse to keep girls as helpless as possible so that parents don't have to have the responsibility of actually teaching their girls how to make good, independant decisions. It's actually really cruel.
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"Tenthly, one should pour tea into the cup first. This is one of the most controversial points of all; indeed in every family in Britain there are probably two schools of thought on the subject. The milk-first school can bring forward some fairly strong arguments, but I maintain that my own argument is unanswerable. This is that, by putting the tea in first and stirring as one pours, one can exactly regulate the amount of milk, whereas one is liable to put in too much milk if one does it the other way round." George Orwell
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